Church today - two birth announcements in the bulletin.
Someone wrote on my FB wall, and when I went to reply via wall-to-wall, it pulled up the last time we'd posted that way. Back in March. I was all a-bubble about how Andrew was coming to the next OB visit to see the ultrasound, to see his little sister for the first time.
I mostly stay ahead of my grief.
But today it's catching up with me. It's reaching for me, ready to tag me.
I don't think about how this Christmas "should" be. I don't let my mind go there.
I just feel the stark emptiness in my arms.
I miss her today.
10 comments:
It happens to every dbm...something will remind us of our old life and the grief that becomes dormant creeps back in...(((hugs)))
(((((hugs)))))
I know the feeling, love. I wish there was something I could do to help, but I can't even help myself with it right now.
I'm sorry Emily. I know much it stinks to get caught off guard with the grief train. It feels like you just got punched in the stomach and you can't move or breathe. I'm sorry for today. I pray that tomorrow and the rest of the month is better.
Hugs,
Trisha
Hang in there my cyber-sister, God WILL get you through this.
I don't like it when it tags me but I know it's bound to happen at some point.
Sending you a warm (((hug))) today, Emily.
I am so sorry for your pain and the "missing"...praying God's comfort and peace as He holds you...
I am sorry Emily.
But you need to pull up atleast for Andrew's sake. Please don't let him feel unloved when you pine for Leila. Take comfort in the fact that God has him to you to take care of
that's me too right now, and when I do cry I try to stay away from my family, so they don't see....my husband says I shouldn't live in the past....I don't....I just miss the future I would have had with her. It is true that we "feel the presence of their absence everywhere". Thinking of you this Christmas, and I love your angel on your tree, wish I could do something like that.
that's me too right now, and when I do cry, I try to stay away from my family, so they don't see.....my husband says I shouldn't live in the past, I don't, I just miss the future I would have had with her. It is true, we see the "presence of their absence" everywhere. Thinking of you....I love your angel on your tree. I wish I could do something like that.
I know I'm late on this. But sending a sigh and a tear your way. Ebbs and flows. Don't think about it... Doesn't matter. It'll get you anyhow. Tonights my turn. Tag, I'm it too!
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